smeagal-ism.

Let's talk about legality for a minute.

Or several, because I think that it's a discussion that is going to take more than a one word Sunday-school answer. Or maybe it is only a one word answer.

I've sort of been mulling over the concept of being comfortable with sin.

Not a light subject exactly.

Exhibit A:

Why do I think it's ok to burn CDs, but it's absolutely not ok to just snag a CD from a music store.

Or

Exhibit B:

Why do I sometimes think its ok to roll my eyes at the creepy couples that spoon in Joes or the Chapel-Heavy-Petters. But you know, speaking pejoratively of someone behind their back is absolutely not ok.

So how are my small reactions less sinful than my big reactions?

And then, I get worked up over it- of all of the things that I said or did that were not exactly "above reproach." and I repent and try to move on, but not without some mental battle of self loathing and condemnation. And then I start clamming up when I'm having normal conversations with people because

what if what I'm about to say isn't edifying? What if I'm wrong? What if I wear a two piece bathing suit? Maybe I shouldn't wear skinny jeans? Oh gosh! Is it wrong to wear makeup or to style my hair? .... now where is that Amish dress that I had from Halloween two years ago- that should be modest enough. Hey Mom have you seen my bonnet, I can't seem to---

HOLD UP.

This is when you say, "You know Rachel, I see your lips moving but all I'm hearing is: legalismlegalismlegalismlegalismlegalismlegalism."

EXACTLY! That's what I thought too.

WE absolutely have freedom because we've been saved by His grace (Hallelujah!).

And should we keep on sinning? By no means. (spoketh St Paul)

But here's the kicker.

Are we free from the condemnation of legality because of God's grace? Well that's obvious.

Or is there another component here? Are we giving ourselves permission to act in a way that might be just

a little sinful?

It's puzzling. There is some aspect of getting cozy with sin, right? Or maybe it's just get cozier still with grace.

Yeah.

My money's on grace.

Grace Wins.

Hm. Sort of like Love Wins. But less universalist.