"Is that edifying?" Mom would ask us. We'd freeze in our spots on the couch, eyes darting from television screen to each other. No one wanted to move. We'd just pretend that we hadn't heard her and keep on in our merry way.
"Rachel?" Now things were personal. She was calling me out by name. I couldn't pretend that I hadn't heard her. I'd watch Sarah and David breathe a sigh of relief as they settled back into the couch. Mom had just made me the family whipping boy.
"Well, it's not that bad!" Pitiful attempt to try to dance around the inevitable answer that no, it wasn't exactly edifying, but durn well if we liked it! Rookie mistake really, because then mom would reply with, "tell me what's edifying about this television program!" And really, what can be said about the Simpsons. Or Seinfeld. Other than--- nothing, really. Homer and Jerry were crass. And both had bad hair.
So we'd turn it off, and mom, placated, would go back to whatever she was doing before her sixth sense of children-acting-in-folly would alert her.
Even though we rolled our eyes until we gave ourselves headaches, and even though Sarah and David would pinch me for not doing a good enough job defending why we were watching that television program, and even though sometimes I was convinced that you were trying to sabotage my life-- well, I just want to say thank you.
Thank you for introducing me to the word edifying and teaching me to choose wisely.
Thanks too for loving me even when I didn't choose wisely and ended up watching Maury when I had strep throat and then didn't sleep for 8 months after that for fear of a serial killer coming to snatch me in the night.
I love you Mom.
Happy Mother's Day (Five Months Later)
"Rachel?" Now things were personal. She was calling me out by name. I couldn't pretend that I hadn't heard her. I'd watch Sarah and David breathe a sigh of relief as they settled back into the couch. Mom had just made me the family whipping boy.
"Well, it's not that bad!" Pitiful attempt to try to dance around the inevitable answer that no, it wasn't exactly edifying, but durn well if we liked it! Rookie mistake really, because then mom would reply with, "tell me what's edifying about this television program!" And really, what can be said about the Simpsons. Or Seinfeld. Other than--- nothing, really. Homer and Jerry were crass. And both had bad hair.
So we'd turn it off, and mom, placated, would go back to whatever she was doing before her sixth sense of children-acting-in-folly would alert her.
Even though we rolled our eyes until we gave ourselves headaches, and even though Sarah and David would pinch me for not doing a good enough job defending why we were watching that television program, and even though sometimes I was convinced that you were trying to sabotage my life-- well, I just want to say thank you.
Thank you for introducing me to the word edifying and teaching me to choose wisely.
Thanks too for loving me even when I didn't choose wisely and ended up watching Maury when I had strep throat and then didn't sleep for 8 months after that for fear of a serial killer coming to snatch me in the night.
I love you Mom.
Happy Mother's Day (Five Months Later)
